SERIOUSLY: Does anyone really know what a “socialite” is?

Socialites aren’t what they used to be. If only Generation Happy Valley were still alive, they’d be scandalized by how much the breed has declined.

Once upon a time, being a socialite meant something. A socialite was a woman with money and/or power. You would gossip about the decadent and unconventional lifestyle she lived, but you would still be desperate to get invited to her parties. Now, it’s lost ALL it’s prestige. A socialite is a hollow role aspired to by ditzy twenty-somethings that believe that money equals status. Socialites nowadays are living high on the verge of auctioneers, travelling “on exotic holidays” but really for arranged raunchy faux pas, crashing celebrity concerts with all the effort it takes to look like they belong backstage. Now, anyone can be a socialite by relying on good looks and commiting to faking it long enough.

It’s not amazing to be termed a “socialite”. What’s amazing is that anyone aspires to be one anymore.

Hi *wave from me* my name is Nali. And I WISH I was not associated with nineties kids. That’s right. Millenials SUCK.

We are the most self-absorbed generation the world has ever seen. We’ve been coddled and made the sole focus of our parents’, teachers’ and families’ lives. So we grow up feeling entitled to that attention, and we desire to maintain that status quo. It needs to STOP.

Reality TV and gossip blogs thrive on following/reporting every thing the rich/famous are up to. And in our minds (even if we really aren’t remarkable) we believe we deserve the same kind of obsessive attention. I know you don’t want to believe so, but life is: AVERAGE. Sure, you will have some wild moments, but also some (f)-ull as (d)-uck days. Life is not nearly interesting enough (nor would it be profitable enough) for all of us to be captured by professionals. But wait, necessity is the mother of invention! So of course, we came up with a fantastic solution – create platforms to capture and share nayOVERSHARE every moment of our lives.

Anything with a camera and internet access automatically made everyone the star of their own reality show. The ability to be your own scriptwriter, producer, camera crew, editor! Now we can create the appearance of a FABULOUS lifestyle that really only accurately constitutes for a few moments of your time each week. You know it’s fake, your close friends know its fake….. Heck everyone knows its fake. Regardless, we look for any and every opportunity to inflate our social standing. Our cardinal rule is: ALWAYS make yourself look more important than you are.

Assuming you sleep an average of 8hrs/night in a week, if you spend 3hours (in total) on social media daily that means you spend about 19% of the time you are awake curating your life on social media. You’re taking out more than a day per week of your awake time just to fake your awake time.

I’m not about to go Ham and be all “QUIT SOCIAL MEDIA!” “THE NEW WORLD ORDER IS TRYING TO CONTROL US!” Most of the time(KOT cyberbullying aside) you’re not directly hurting, mistreating or offending anyone. BUT, you are purposely misleading each other.

It is human nature to be competitive, to be on level(fit in) or better(stand out) playing ground. Factor in our self-invested culture, and the pressure to share your life is on. We are pseudo-socialites in a world that doesn’t actually revolve around us, because truthfully, everyone is busy thinking about themselves.

Living in this curated world, means our generation loses opportunities to better our perception. All we see is fake grandeur, so we miss out on the chance to actually perceive real grandeur. We prevent ourselves from actually knowing what it is so we can attain it. We delay our own growth.

In older generations, it wasn’t uncommon to be out of the house, independent, earning a living, married or even have children in your early twenties. How many of us under the age of 24 are still living in their parents home? Ok, the economy went a little haywire there, but is that the real excuse? “There are no jobs.” “The older people need to move out of their positions, and let us take over.” But honestly, when previous generations look at us, they always say, “When I was your age…” and they’re right. The difference between them and us has them honestly scared to leave anything in our hands.

Look at yourself, people you know, or think you know through the media… Why do we interact? We are pre-occupied with self-glorification. Our own self-obsession prevents us from meaningfully interacting with the world around us. No wonder we continue to complain about it.

This is usually where while discussing with my friends someone points out “But wait, it’s not really our fault then! Our parents, the environment we were raised in, we have been conditioned this way.” This IS true. The previous generations have instilled in us this idea (which I believe is extremely destructive) that extensive formal education is mandatory for success. They tell us daily as we grow up to “Stay in school and get good grades to be succesful”. Even worse, they actually show us this by refusing to hire anyone without a degree or experience; even for entry level positions.

We are, as a result, the most educated generation to date (general knowledge). Also, we have done/are doing the most schooling out of all generations before. Whether this is a weakness or a strength, I don’t know….. For those coming out of better schools, with alumni systems and built in networks to place employment, you will do quite fine. But not everyone is that fortunate.

You get to a point where the “truth” of “Study hard to get ahead in life” is defeated. Higher education without strong networking opportunities is not a very efficient way to move forward. Suddenly, you realise that generally academic effort greatly supercedes your gains. The hunger for success increases, but you lose the motivation to work.

And here is where the blame shifts to be us. Millenials, the pampered, carefully watched/monitored and constantly encouraged generation are not open to doing the jobs that our grandparents did. Getting dirty, clerical jobs, manual jobs, service jobs…. But I finished high school in 10th percentile! I graduated from Uni Second Upper! Our self-obsession has manifested an idea in our heads that we are all destined to be no less than celebrities, senior management or CEOs. So we shy away from tasks that we deem below us. We would rather hold out for the perfect opportunity.

I can’t fix the worldwide epidemic of self-absorbed twenty year olds. But you, just like I did, should realize you are part of this problem.

Stop spending so much time on social media. And not because it will add mystery to your status, “Where has she been?” “Wonder what she is doing!”. Do it to start spending more time on yourself. Spending more time in your REAL not virtual life. Live a life free from pressure to be super-fun, glamorous, or expensive. Instead find the beauty in your boring and awkward days and your CRAZY, interesting, Last-Night-Was-A-Movie days. Find peace in solitude, allow your choices to be free from your exchanges with other people. Whatever your personal identity is, it will be a lot more rewarding and much more effortless.

So if you are like me, you don’t care what or who a socialite is.

While she was tweeting about how hard it is to find a job, someone her EXACT SAME age is out there doing a job she didn’t want.
When she was blacking out after being super crazy on a Monday night >”Thursdays are for amateurs! Me and my clique we pop bottles all week! That ish cray”<, someone herr EXACT SAME age was making those drinks for her.
When she is sitting around in her “funemployment”, filtering her pictures, posting a bunch of crap pretending to be rich, someone her EXACT SAME age is actually on their way there.

(Don’t despair, whatever you decide ladies, Uncle Chim looooooooves us all. Like he says ” I cant reject any p***y, ratchet or not!”)