Tag: Alex Mwakideu

How to cheat and not get caught

Posted on by Ozymandias

I’d originally created this guide for idiots like Samidoh, Terrence Creative, Professor Hamo, Mr Seed, Jalang’o, Mwakideu but since then the list has grown to include Frankie Just Gym It and Akuku Danger. You see, over the last number of months and years, we have been inundated by reports of Kenyan celebrities cheating on their wives and getting caught because they are actually a dense lot.

Samidoh’s failure: Karen Nyamu is what you get when your husband is weak

The one thing these men I mentioned have in common with their affairs is the fact that they humiliated their wives. Kabi was Jesus did not cheat on his wife but he humiliated her. For some reason, rather than bite the bit and deal with the situation he created, he dragged his wife into his nonsense and made her the subject of hate once his ruse was exposed.

But the thing is, none of them, not Professor Hamo, not Jalang’o and definitely not Kabi was Jesus nor Mwakideu would have had to deal with the public humiliation their wives were exposed to had they had mentors cut from the old testament cloth.

Learning from female celebs: Don’t date her if she’s heavily active on social media

First off, let us shed the bullshit notion that men don’t cheat. From there, let us understand and agree that men with as many options as these Kenyan celebrities do will definitely step out of their marriage once or twice. But that doesn’t mean they do not love their wives nor that they are terrible husbands and fathers.

Alex Mwakideu

Alex Mwakideu

Secondly, we should also accept that given the context we are discussing, the men in question are high-value men. They have money and status and while most of them do not have looks, that is a distant third in third world situations that the prevalent one in Kenya.

“Sitoi hii mimba” Mr Seed’s ex side chick reveals why she will not abort months old pregnancy

Ok, now let us get into how a married man or men can get away with infidelity but we must appreciate that there are ways to cheat on your wife and not get caught up like Terrence Creative, Professor Hamo, Jalang’o or Mwakideu and this is actually what would be best for all parties involved rather than them trying to maintain their hypocritical facade.

Professor Hamo

Professor Hamo

First, all your actions must follow one rule, and that cardinal rule is that you must never humiliate your wife. That should form the basis of your intent and actions. Do not rub your affairs in your spouses face. The idea here is for you to be discreet because what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her. Do not tell your WhatsApp group or friends or pose for pictures that your clande has taken.

Mr Seed saga: Baby trapping a man does not work

Also, you do not allow your affair partner to disrespect your partner. They need to understand that their position isn’t to challenge for the queen’s spot. And to accomplish this, you have to be very clear as to whether or not you want to keep her as a second wife or if your affair partner is merely a plaything. Imagine if Samidoh and a host of other celebrities understood this and made their stance on the matter clear.

Somali lady ‘dating’ Mr Seed

Do not make a woman uglier than your wife your clande. I do not know why this is something Kenyan celebs do not understand. Never ever pick a woman who will make your wife wonder why her. You want to be able to argue and reason with your wife (in the event you’re caught) that you had no choice because your partner is hot. It might seem counterintuitive but what happens is when you’re busted, it sparks competition anxiety in your wife. That was not the case when Professor Hamo, Jalang’o or Mwakideu were busted but it is arguably the case for Mr Seed and Samidoh.

 

First wife, Eddy with hubby Samidoh

As for the how:

Get a kabambe
This should be the first rule out of common sense. You never use your personal phone to sweet talk and sext. That is an amateur mistake. You need to know that your phone is always subject to scrutiny. So what you do is get a trap phone that you keep hidden in your car.
Don’t alter your behaviour
Stop changing things like your cologne, stop switching your schedule and stop altering your behaviour. you simply act like everything is normal. And that is easy to do when you’re in control of the relationship.

Crucial lessons Kenyans can learn from Alex Mwakideu’s cheating scandal

Don’t send Mpesa
One of the easiest ways for men -especially married men- to get caught, is by sending Mpesa to their lovers. Now all she needs to do is to provide that trail to your partner and your goose is cooked.

Stop sending nudes
Do I really need to explain this?! Can you not see how much drama this particular stunt has caused DJ Mo? He cannot even go on the offensive to defend himself otherwise, he risks having his pecker leaked online.

Alex Mwakideu finally comes clean on rumours claiming he cheated on wife

At the end of the day, we need to understand that unlike DJ Mo, we aren’t trying to bring shame to ourselves and our families. The best option to take when the urge to stray bites is for you to simply not. But if the urge grows beyond your capacity to handle it, then surely, it is our responsibility to ensure we do not get caught.

For more thought-provoking opinion pieces, click here. And be sure to like our Facebook page.

How to cheat and not humiliate your wife [UPDATED]

Posted on by Ozymandias

I’d originally created this guide for idiots like Samidoh, Terrence Creative, Professor Hamo, Mr Seed, Jalang’o, Mwakideu but since then the list has grown to include Frankie Just Gym It and Akuku Danger. You see, over the last number of months and years, we have been inundated by reports of Kenyan celebrities cheating on their wives and getting caught because they are actually a dense lot.

Samidoh’s failure: Karen Nyamu is what you get when your husband is weak

The one thing these men I mentioned have in common with their affairs is the fact that they humiliated their wives. Kabi was Jesus did not cheat on his wife but he humiliated her. For some reason, rather than bite the bit and deal with the situation he created, he dragged his wife into his nonsense and made her the subject of hate once his ruse was exposed.

Celebrated media personality, Jalang’o

But the thing is, none of them, not Professor Hamo, not Jalang’o and definitely not Kabi was Jesus nor Mwakideu would have had to deal with the public humiliation their wives were exposed to had they had mentors cut from the old testament cloth.

Learning from female celebs: Don’t date her if she’s heavily active on social media

First off, let us shed the bullshit notion that men don’t cheat. From there, let us understand and agree that men with as many options as these Kenyan celebrities do will definitely step out on their marriage once or twice. But that doesn’t mean they do not love their wives nor that they are terrible husbands and fathers.

Alex Mwakideu

Alex Mwakideu

Secondly, we should also accept that given the context we are discussing, the men in question are high-value men. They have money and status and while most of them do not have looks, that is a distant third in third world situations that the prevalent one in Kenya.

“Sitoi hii mimba” Mr Seed’s ex side chick reveals why she will not abort months old pregnancy

Ok, now let us get into how a married man or men can get away with infidelity but we must appreciate that there are ways to cheat on your wife and not get caught up like Terrence Creative, Professor Hamo, Jalang’o or Mwakideu and this is actually what would be best for all parties involved rather than them trying to maintain their hypocritical facade.

Professor Hamo

Professor Hamo

First, all your actions must follow one rule, and that cardinal rule is that you must never humiliate your wife. That should form the basis of your intent and actions. Do not rub your affairs in your spouses face. The idea here is for you to be discreet because what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her. Do not tell your WhatsApp group or friends or pose for pictures that your clande has taken.

Mr Seed saga: Baby trapping a man does not work

Also, you do not allow your affair partner to disrespect your partner. They need to understand that their position isn’t to challenge for the queen’s spot. And to accomplish this, you have to be very clear as to whether or not you want to keep her as a second wife or if your affair partner is merely a plaything. Imagine if Samidoh and a host of other celebrities understood this and made their stance on the matter clear.

Somali lady ‘dating’ Mr Seed

Do not make a woman uglier than your wife your clande. I do not know why this is something Kenyan celebs do not understand. Never ever pick a woman who will make your wife wonder why her. You want to be able to argue and reason with your wife (in the event you’re caught) that you had no choice because your partner is hot. It might seem counterintuitive but what happens is when you’re busted, it sparks competition anxiety in your wife. That was not the case when Professor Hamo, Jalang’o or Mwakideu were busted but it is arguably the case for Mr Seed and Samidoh.

Karen Nyamu with former helper, Samidoh

As for the how,

Get a kabambe
This should be the first rule out of common sense. You never use your personal phone to sweet talk and sext. That is an amateur mistake. You need to know that your phone is always subject to scrutiny. So what you do is get a trap phone that you keep hidden in your car.
Don’t alter your behaviour
Stop changing things like your cologne, stop switching your schedule and stop altering your behaviour. you simply act like everything is normal. And that is easy to do when you’re in control of the relationship.

Crucial lessons Kenyans can learn from Alex Mwakideu’s cheating scandal

Don’t send Mpesa
One of the easiest ways for men -especially married men- to get caught, is by sending Mpesa to their lovers. Now all she needs to do is to provide that trail to your partner and your goose is cooked.

Stop sending nudes
Do I really need to explain this?! Can you not see how much drama this particular stunt has caused DJ Mo? He cannot even go on the offensive to defend himself otherwise, he risks having his pecker leaked online.

Alex Mwakideu finally comes clean on rumours claiming he cheated on wife

At the end of the day, we need to understand that unlike DJ Mo, we aren’t trying to bring shame to ourselves and our families. The best option to take when the urge to stray bites is for you to simply not. But if the urge grows beyond your capacity to handle it, then surely, it is our responsibility to ensure we do not get caught.

For more thought-provoking opinion pieces, click here. And be sure to like our Facebook page.

Jalango’s move to replace Andrew Kibe at Kiss FM morning show may be his smartest career move yet

Posted on by Kibaki Muthamia

It’s a tall order trying to make an accurate assessment of Kenya’s entertainment scene without considerable tribute to a phenomenal entity, Felix Odiwuor variously known as Mzee Jalang’o or just plainly, as Jalas.

Well, here’s a seasoned jack to a lot of trades.

Jalango is an established stand-up comedian, event MC, influential radio presenter and an astute businessman running a thriving event-hosting company called Arena Media.

Jalang'o with presenter Alex Mwakideu at Milele FM studio (file image)
Jalang’o with presenter Alex Mwakideu at Milele FM studio (file image)

This is a shrewd man used to making headlines on entertainment sites, gutter blogs and mainstream media, but keen observation shows a performer aware of the secret to being a darling to the masses – remain relevant.

Until a few weeks ago, Jalas has been hosting an influential morning radio show at Milele FM, alongside popular co-host Alex Mwakideu. He sensationally quit, citing contractual disagreements and has since joined Kiss FM, replacing the iconic controversial presenter Andrew Kibe at the morning show.

It’s easy to get fooled by his trademark green suit and a well-used, leopard-print shirt. Well, this is his mark of trade on stage, and hosting events as an MC – corporate and otherwise.

Beyond that smoke screen is a determined, focused and ambitious man, with a realistic finger-touch feel of the region’s needs in terms of entertainment. And, the guts to gamble and take career risks to reposition himself to take advantage of the trends.

Felix Odiwuor has come a long way – from a roadside comic byline to a regional, influential public personality. It hasn’t been an easy ride.

As always, this success story is inspired by bleak, humble beginnings. The usual tagline starts with a struggling background. He had willing and loving parenting, but life being unapologetically what it is, he faced lots of grounding uphill in early schooling.

Jalang’o, like many other artists of repute, owes a pie to the Kenya National Theater halls, where he moonlighted as a fickle second-cast entry for a whopping three years. He’d join the travelling theatre making play of high school literature set books. Well, lady luck did smile on him.

As wheels of fate inevitably turn, a break happened out of the blues – Papa Shirandula Show on Citizen TV. Alongside colleague and friend, Captain Otoyo (aka Otos), they’d clinch and secure spots on the show that’d endear them to the viewership and catapult the show’s ratings to the top.

Jalang’o has never looked back.

On the current trend with Jalang’o replacing Andrew Kibe at Kiss FM, what many do not know is that Jalas also owes the station a significant piece of his success.

Kiss FM is the station that gave the comedian and presenter the doorway to greatness, ways back. At the time, Jalas was performing on the Papa Shirandula show, and a slot had opened at Kiss FM. Despite impossible odds, Jalas aced the interview without any academic papers – they wanted a ‘degree person’!

Since then, he’s worked with Radio Maisha, then Hot 96 alongside iconic Jeff Koinange before a move to Milele FM for a morning sting with presenter Alex Mwakideu.

The move to the Kiss FM morning show to pair up with outspoken lady presenter Kamene Goro may be Jalang’o’s best career move yet.

He’s come of age – he’s influential, established on the social scene shedding the hustler image to join the polished, perhaps corporate listenership section. It’s time Jalang’o sheds the comic, pea-brained clown persona to embrace a polished, urban, well informed analytic presenter.

Kiss FM commands a large section of the urban radio segment, and this is where the present-day Jalang’o really fits.

Alex Mwakideu doesn’t owe an explanation about his decision to stay at Milele FM

Posted on by Ozymandias

Alex Mwakideu it would seem, agreed to a 50 per cent pay cut in order for him to safeguard his job at Milele FM. That is the reason why both he and Jalang’o, his former morning show partner are no longer working together for Milele FM.

Why Kenyans defended Alex Mwakideu but persecuted Jalang’o

You see, Jalang’o opted not to accept the paycut. Alex Mwakideu, however, familiar with the pressures he faces and the unique situations they occasion, has decided that he would swallow humble pie and stay on.

alex mwakideu and jalang'o
Milele FM co-hosts, Jalang´o (left) and Alex Mwakideu (right)

Ofcourse, this isn’t a popular decision with a lot of the fans and followers on his former partner in crime, Jalang’o’s social media accounts demanding an explanation of why he took the option he did. As a result, Jalas took his right of reply and commented on the matter.

Alex Mwakideu’s reaction after learning about Jalango’s exit from Milele FM

According to what happened with regards to Alex Mwakideu, Heavy J explained that his reaction was as follows:

Crucial lessons Kenyans can learn from Alex Mwakideu's infidelity scandal

Alex Mwakideu, my friend and my brother did not know that I was not going to come to work. When we did not agree on a lot of things and my HR told me we seem to have hit a rock, you will not come to work tomorrow. I tried calling Mwakideu he had already slept. He wakes up in the morning thinking that I will be going to work, at six he calls and says bro you’re late where are you? I told him I’m not coming, I’ve been fired.

Mwakideu sank low and told me bro you are lying and told him it’s the truth, the redundancy affected me and I will not be coming to work. Mwakideu told me that it was the longest 4 hours of his life because he had to do the show alone.

Crucial lessons Kenyans can learn from Alex Mwakideu’s cheating scandal

But the truth of the matter as stated earlier is that Alex Mwakideu owes no one an explanation. We all came into this world alone. When our time arrives, we shall exit alone.

alex mwakideu

Alex Mwakideu at the end of the day, as the head of his household, is aware that the buck stops with him when it comes to his family. When rent is due, or school fees and his children look to him, he cannot feed them excuses. So he took the only decision that seemed to make sense to him.

Alex Mwakideu’s wife celebrates her husband with emotional message as he turns 40 years!

This ofcourse is thinking in line with the information we have that Mediamax, the parent company of Milele FM and K24 had demanded all its employees take a hefty pay cut.

alex mwakideu and jalas in studio
Milele FM presenters, Jalang´o (left) and Alex Mwakideu (right)

At the end of the day, the day ends and Alex Mwakideu is well aware that his battles are his own to bear. While he did not foresee the firing of his crony, he wasn’t in a position to do anything about it and he will simply have to keep trudging on with this thing called life. And ultimately, he is in charge of deciding the outcome of his life and he owes it to himself to put in every effort to make his life great.

 

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Why Kenyans defended Alex Mwakideu but persecuted Jalang’o

Posted on by Ozymandias

Alex Mwakideu and Jalang’o were both exposed by their new archnemesis, Edgar Obare and it was rather interesting to see how Kenyans reacted to their two situations very differently. The dichotomy between the two reactions was almost night and day. With Jalang’o, Kenyans were livid at the radio personality, to the point of using his indiscretions as proof that men from his ethnic community are no good lotharios.
When it was Alex Mwakideu up on the chopping block, Kenyans reacted with revulsion towards Edgar Obare to the point of calling for his man card to be revoked.

“We will not defend ourselves” Jalang’o confirms viral screenshot chats from ‘The boys club’ are true

Mwakideu’s visitation was a literal mirror of Jalas’own situation but the reactions were on two opposite ends of the spectrum. Both have a WhatsApp group that they use to boast about their conquests. Boys Club vs Porini. And because it is such an interesting case study, I want us to look at why Kenyans reacted to these two men and their situations so divergently.

Edgar Obare and Jalang'o

For starters, Kenyans are tribalists. That is why people immediately went into that mode of thinking where they felt Jalang’o was merely living up to his tribe’s stereotype of being a ladies man. The Nairobian even ran a piece that was so bullshit, it literally reads “Why women are running away from Luo men after Jalang’o’s drama”. The details about what Jalas and Alex do are nearly identical down to their WhatsApp group yet here Kenyans want to treat them differently. Why? Because one is a Luo and the other isn’t.

Crucial lessons Kenyans can learn from Alex Mwakideu’s cheating scandal

The second reason for the different reactions was the fact that fundamentally, these two men represent different values. Well, that should have an asterisk to it. Jalang’o and Alex Mwakideu are the same animals but different beasts. They stand on the same value sets. But Mwakideu outwardly espouses a different set of values. He is “the family man”. As a result, Kenyans rallied to his defence arguing that Edgar Obare was ruining families. He was callously exposing a philanderer and causing his wife to leave.

Jalas and Mwakideu
Milele FM co-hosts, Jalang´o (left) and Alex Mwakideu (right)

The third reason for this nonsense is that Jalang’o who is flashy, courts envy more than Alex Mwakideu. Jalang’o is flashy. He is everywhere. Get online and chances are, you will come across his brand. On TV, you will interact with his brand. He is also a radio personality. Also, he is vocal. This has caused a lot of men who openly envy and resent Jalas to bash him. On the other hand, Mwakideu has presented himself as a laid back man so men who do not view him as a threat would rather cape for him.

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Stop blaming Edgar Obare for the fault in your stars

Posted on by Ozymandias

Edgar Obare has come under attack so much these past few days after he leaked information about two married radio personalities’ infidelity. Edgar Obare has seemed to be a man possessed when it comes to “dishing tea” about Jalang’o and Alex Mwakideu.
Actually it has seemed like a concerted campaign to be honest. he seems to have a hard-on for destroying these two men.

Alex Mwakideu’s infidelity exposed as Edgar Obare introduces ‘Porini boys’!

And that is the issue many people are bringing up with regard to Edgar Obare but first, the backstory. He dropped a gem on Jalang’o, exposing the fact that he is part of a WhatsApp group that was all about smashing women and living a good life.
Alex Mwakideu was next when Edgar Obare revealed his affair with a fat female who honestly I feel wasn’t worth him risking his marriage over but you know, some men can get anyone, others take whoever takes them.

Jalang'o and Edgar Obare
Milele FM co-hosts, Jalang´o (left) and Alex Mwakideu (right)

Edgar Obare was the subject of much-heated debate after he revealed Alex Mwakideu’s affair and philandering ways as Kenyans demanded he cease exposing these men.
Suddenly, it was his fault for destroying these two friends and co-workers marriages. Suddenly, the micro blogger needed to hand in his man-card with Andrew Kibe even speaking on the matter. Twitter was set ablaze with all the know-nothing intelligentsia (who feel the sun rises from their posteriors), giving their hot take on masculinity and how Edgar Obare has betrayed men.

“Don’t blame me for your poor judgement and problems!” Edgar Obare tells Jalang’o to man up!

And now that the dust has settled, it is time for us to actually have an intelligent conversation about what’s what and hopefully cut through the bullshit. And that at the end of the day boils down to projection.
Edgar Obare did nothing wrong. He is a tabloid micro-blogger using his own IG platform for some serious content creation and he is earning money from it. He meets his financial obligations and is smart about making sure he spaces his content to keep all of Kenya hooked.

Alex Mwakideu and his wife

Jalang’o and Alex Mwakideu did nothing out of the ordinary. I have to state that fact. The two men simply attempted to actualize their sexual strategy: Sleep with as many women as possible. We aren’t here to debate the ethics and morality of the matter and I do not care what your bishop says. Go and give him your three hundred and ten shillings tithe and shut the hell up.
The only sin here worth discussing is the fact that they were sloppy enough to get caught.

¨You are not man enough!¨ Kenyans ruthlessly take on Edgar Obare following Jalango´s expose

Edgar Obare isn’t some sort of moral standard nor is he claiming to be policing Kenya’s moral fabric. He is simply a micro-blogger doing business. Take your opinions of that to the toilet. Jalang’o got caught. He will answer to his marriage. I think he is high value enough for him to survive this scandal. The same goes for Alex Mwakideu. I mean, sure, there will be hell to pay because they have made their wives shame public but beyond that, they will be alright.
But Kenyans are deep in their feelings about this. And it is because they are projecting their fear of getting caught onto Edgar. How dare he snitch? How dare he expose the fault in our stars?!

Jalas, Alex Mwakideu and Alex' alleged mistress

Nah, ask instead why your stars got caught. Why are you so scared of getting caught? Don’t be sloppy. Keep your wits about your indiscretion. Keep your house in order. No one is coming to save you. You get yourself into your mess, you get yourself out. It wasn’t Edgar Obare who put these two men’s families in jeopardy. All he did was business. And the last time I checked, Kenya is a capitalist economy. Feelings peleka kwa choo.
And sure, Edgar Obare is going after Jalas and Mwakideu like a dog with a bone but they never should have given him ammunition. And at the end of the day, if he has the evidence to back up his allegations, he has them in pocket.

Ted Josiah and the dishonesty of men blaming Jalang’o

Be upset at the two men for letting you down if indeed you looked up to them.

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