Sheila Kwamboka: “I Can’t Stand When Women Say ‘Men Should Be Providers’”

Popular radio presenter and MC Sheila Kwamboka has expressed her disdain for certain statements women make about men, particularly phrases like “men should be providers.” While Kwamboka acknowledges that men should fulfill their responsibilities in caring for women, she believes such statements are often used vindictively, causing harm to men.

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She shared an example from a podcast where a woman admitted to breaking up with her partner because he could no longer provide for her. When asked why she couldn’t stay and support him during a tough time, the woman insisted that the man should always be able to provide and should apologize for his failure to do so. Kwamboka found this attitude hurtful and manipulative.

Kwamboka also criticized the phrase “real men,” which she finds both annoying and unkind. She challenged the idea that women who use this term know what it means to be a “real man,” questioning whether they have ever lived life from a man’s perspective. She argued that such statements often stem from hearsay rather than lived experience and called for more empathy toward those going through personal struggles.

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According to Kwamboka, many of these phrases adopted by Kenyan women have been influenced by African-American women, who, in her view, have distanced themselves from African identity.