Delivery Boy: Kenyans are Annoyingly Poor in Giving Directions

It was fun learning colors back in elementary school. Remember belting out that catchy tone “Richard Of York Gained Battle In Vain“? That’s to name the color spectrum on the rainbow, from the red at the top to violet at the bottom.

All good. Except, the basic spectrum mutated into a thousand other variations that makes color identification an impossible exercise.

Kenyans are generally poor with colors.

I have suffered on my delivery runs for orders made from my online business. I sell second-hand kids clothing from my house. Online business model is great, and the weakest part in that chain is the human factor.

Delivery is a total nightmare, if you remember that Kenyans also share a collective inability to give directions properly. In a day’s work, expect a mix of hilarious and equally frustrating experiences.

My business has pages on all social media pages, but activity is highest on Facebook and Twitter pages. On a daily basis, I take photos of clothes available with my phone at different angles, and upload. From my page, I share the posts on other Facebook pages and groups for more visibility.

I log into Twitter, check top trends of the day and tag along. On average, depending on the day of the week, and date – I engage with a different number of clients. There are direct referrals by past clients, and general queries. I spend six to seven hours online every day, engaging with clients.

If you’ve ever tried to fish, this is it. The item is the bait, but – will the clients bite? Out of 10 possible clients making an inquiry, 5 will ask the price of the item, and go silent. Three will ask possible date for the next ‘Bale Opening’, and so on.

Two out of 10, will make an order, and pay. I have a Safaricom Till Number displayed on the page. Now comes the delivery part. I deliver free within town, and a small fee out of town. I live in Nyeri.

Client 1: Kuja tu na Kimathi Street. Hapo kati kati kuna junction ya Waridi Supermarket. Chukua hio njia. Utapata shop ya viatu imepakwa green karibu na taa ya tatu ya Mulika Mwizi... (I’m on a green-painted shoe shop on a road off Kimathi Street, at the Waridi Supermarket Junction).

Well, I find out it’s a four-way junction and each of those roads has a series of County Council floodlights. I’m lost. When I later find the shop, it’s not green-painted, it’s mint. Close.

Client 2: I’m a teacher at St.Michael Preparatory School, on the end of Koinange Avenue. I’ll meet you, I’m in a red top.

Easy, right? Teachers are precise and articulate. Wrong, they are Kenyan! First, there’s no Koinange Avenue, and worse, the school has a plethora of branches. The teacher is in a maroon top!

All these cases mean a great deal of to-and-fro with clients. Mercifully, most of my clients are on WhatsApp, so there’s a bit of online calls and chats. Sometimes, the clients are offline. It’s down to regular calls on Safaricom.

In the beginning, calling and data rates would eat heavily into profits. It took a while to break even, but lately its easier with Nyoosha Shilingi, the new Safaricom data and calling rates plan. I’ve even started video calls with clients. Kids are now more proactive in choosing colors and styles of their clothing.

It’s easier with online video calls, which means no returns and more referrals from happy clients.

Safaricom has activated Nyoosha Shilingi, timely offer that shields their clients in the present harsh economic times with new and revamped data bundles. For the same price, Data, Calls and SMS offers are extended by between 40% and 100%.

This means, unlike before when I’d use Ksh20 to buy 50MBS, now the amount fetches me 100MBS. That’s double!

What’s better is that the data doesn’t run in the middle of a clients call. It’s not as rushed as before!

Since I’m a daily internet user, I prefer daily data packages. I’m now purchasing 300MBs daily bundle, for just Ksh50. Previously, this would buy just 150MBs. I usually purchase data plans from MPesa, though – one can still purchase bundles by loading airtime or redeeming Bonga Points.

I have clients who prefer the weekly package, of which Ksh99 gets 500MBs, instead of the usual 350MBs. That’s an almost 50% increase.

Clothes move more when school closes, so I expect more client engagement. I’m budgeting for the Nyoosha Shilingi offer of 2.5GB+Free WhatsApp for Ksh500 bob, so that I don’t need to log out between sessions.

All Safaricom customers: Prepaid, Postpaid and Hybrid can access new Nyoosha Shilingi data plans.

There’s more really, on offer on the Safaricom website. Some good deals. What wouldn’t you stream on the 7GB+Feee WhatsApp bundle? It’s just Ksh1000. It’s time to chill and watch a movie after work!

Only specific bundles come with free WhatsApp. It’s easy to check the new data plans. Just dial *544#, *555#. Also, plans are displayed on My Safaricom App, Blaze App and on the official Safaricom website – www.safaricom.co.ke/bundles.

It’s a whole new experience on Safaricom’s seamless network.

Pro Tip: It’s always a better experience with your gadget if their apps and software is up to date. The new data plans are ideal for this purpose. There will be plenty of leftover data for fun!