How To Get Laid Quickly During This Cold Season

Due to global warming, it’s cold season once again here in nairobi and I know you don’t care about science or whether the earth’s climate is getting messed up. You only care about sex. So this is a quick guide for quick sex with women. If you are looking to get laid easy and fast during this cold season, there are a few things you need to consider

1. Lower your standards (a little)

I know you like dark skin chics or light skin babes but come on now. This isn’t the time to be a ‘skinicist’. If such a word exists. You’re looking for sex, not a future rurashio partner.

You don’t have to throw out all standards. But if you want to get laid fast, you should probably sacrifice some things you would normally want.

Maybe the chic weighs more than Madtraxx and Mejja combined. Maybe she’s dumber than Huddah Monroe. Maybe her hairstyle is not so appealing. Who cares. This is about sex. Funga macho na unyandue..haha

Be honest with yourself. Either you’re turned on by her, or not. If your friends will make fun of you for hitting on the momo chick who turns you on, then go out alone. You can switch back to your original standards when the sun is shining again

2. Focus on DTF chics

In case you have been living in Cuban jungles and have no idea who ‘DTF chics’ are? Then let me be kind enough and tell you. These are girls that are yearning for the ‘stick’. They have either been in dry spells for long or just love getting banged.

If you are looking for quick lungula yet the girl you are chasing is not ‘Down to Fuck’ than you’re just wasting your time. Do not waste any time on a girl who isn’t going to give you exactly what you want. You would rather focus on finding the girl who is ready to have sex quickly, instead of warming up a girl who might be a gamble.

So, how do you tell if a girl is DTF? Here’s a few tell tale signs that I look for:

1. i.She doesn’t get angry when you bring up sexual topics. If you are chatting with a girl who gets angry when you mention even one sexual word, you are wasting your time
2. ii.She talks a lot. If you meet a girl who talks a lot and pays attention to everything you say, or responds immediately every time you text her, she wants the ‘D’
3. iii.She moves her body a lot: The is the classic horny girl indicator. Her feet are moving, her eyes are staring everywhere, her hands are touchy touchy

3. Hunt online too

There are plenty of prospects online nowadays. Just don’t be creepy. An app like Tinder is very useful for getting laid so long as your main picture is one where you are wearing a suit or standing next to car. All women are materialistic. It’s just the levels that vary. To a lady, a man who is wearing a suit or standing next to a car is a man who is focused and has his mind towards wealth

For sites like Facebook and Instagram, look for the chics that like your posts more often. Those girls are your secret admirers. Hit them up and ask to take them out. If you play your cards, right, you will bang them. I have banged several.

4. Approach lots of women and put your sexuality out there

By far the most important thing to do is approach lots of girls. Punani won’t just come to you from heaven. You are not Justin Bieber

If your head is in the right place and you’re not afraid of rejections, this should be simple.

This is a numbers game. The more chics, you approach the more you will bang

Putting your sexual desires out there will screen out the wrong girls. This includes girls who are interested, but not interested enough to close the deal that night. If you aren’t sexual enough, you will waste your time on girls who enjoy the attention/ flirting, but aren’t willing to sleep with you quickly.

5. Don’t be afraid to ask

This no time for the ‘let’s take things slow and see what happens’ bullshit. Sometimes, honesty is the best policy when it comes to fitting your genitals together with someone else’s. When you’re having a great time with someone and there’s a “vibe,” oftentimes both parties will wuss out and end up in bed alone dissecting the entire evening and wondering what went wrong (while probably also masturbating, maybe crying).

It’s like when you were in school and your teacher would say, “If you have a question, chances are someone else in the class has the same one, so ask it.” If you want to bang a chic, chances are she wants to bag you too. But she won’t even talk about it. It’s your job. Man up, take one of the team, and invite her to your crib

For more tips on ‘kuomba vitu’ you can read my article on ‘How To Negotiate With A Kenyan Girl For Sex When She Comes To Your Place’