CAMPUS EXPOSED: These Are The Characteristics Of A Typical Nairobi University Campus Girl…Her Drinks, Her Choice Of Men, Her Sex Life, Her Manners.

The second installment of the CAMPUS EXPOSED series continues today… Yesterday we tried to, despite the challenges, walk into the mind and live the life of a typical Kenyatta University girl. Straight from the classroom to her hangout joints and her very wild and appetizing preference of men.

And so today,let’s walk into the life of a typical Nairobi Uni girl. What’s she like? What does she like? Who does she date? What’s her lunch date like? Where and what does she drink? How does she party?

How active is her sex life? How affordable is she? What ticks her off? What’s her class faithfulness like?

The girl from Nairobi Uni isn’t very different from the girl from K.U. They’re almost like two peas in the same pod… As far as their love for sex and alcohol and tackiness is concerned,these are like the same people. Brought together by that unifying demon we call Campus.

But don’t be fooled,you cannot compare the financial might,shrewdness,wit,experience and exploits of a Nairobi University girl to that of a K.U girl. It’s NOT called the Nairobi Uni for no reason at all.

Led by and almost run by the seemingly invincible SONU behemoth Babu Owino,these girls have almost seen it all,heard it all,done it all and been through it all.

So, come with me… And let me take you through the World,the very debauched world,of a Nairobi Uni chick.

PARTY

These are the Queens of The Campus Party – Ok,with the exception of the USIU mafiosos. You cannot teach a Nairobi Uni babe how to throw down a party. Or act in one. They’re the life of the party,regularly throwing one of their own or getting mad invites to endless parties going down every weekend. And as for turning up,these damsels do know how to show up and put down a show. They’ll show up in numbers, tight gangs of some of the sexiest babes … Dressed to the nines,looking like a ten and leaving alot to the imagination. You will need to also be a very good party host to keep them around you for long. They’re notoriously selective and choosy and,given a chance,they can wreck up stuff with the efficience of a fire.

TRUANCY

If you thought the K.U girls were seasoned class absconders,you haven’t met the girls from the Babu Owino complex. They don’t even need reasons to skive classes… Anything is a reason to them. It could be a mild headache. Or the trivial fact that they do not like a particular lecturer. Or the lesson itself. These girls are good at stauing away from class and our research shows that some can go for as long as a whole week without ever showing up in class. How they still manage to keep up with the lessons and jot down all those volumes of notes remains a mystery. Still,they ain’t showing up in class. Not that fast.

SPONSORS

Now, this is THE HOME of sponsors. The true Home Of All things funded. According to our survey,60% of the girls from Nairobi Uni have a sponsor, or two, or three, lying around somewhere. And unlike the girls from Prof. Olive Mugenda’s institution,the Nairobi Uni girls would rather date old, influential power brokers, City politicians and billionaire Hugh Hefners than dating some regular dude with a little black Toyota and some couple thousands in the wallet. They go big. And go hard. This is evident by the number-and type of-cars that roll into the compound to pick them up every weekend for a wild, decadent getaway.

SEX LIFE

Leave it to this girl. There ain’t nothing you can teach this cat. She’s a thorough bedroom bully. And she’s bad to the bone. Just like her comrades elsewhere, her weekends and parties are not complete without a good, long round of the good old D. They’re readily available and have an incredibly huge appetite for some good romp in the sack. She, unlike many of her colleagues, does love to use protection. Though not at all time. And with everyone. She can be reckless too. And also ,this is also said to be the home of lesbianism.

You are more likely to stumble into a lesbian orgy than to run into a study room in these dark,dissolute hallways.

ALCOHOL/STIMULANT USE

For this girl, nothing is ever complete if it’s not peppered with some alcohol or any form of stimulant. They’re notorious partakers of the good old brew. It could be anything and everything. For the less classy, they’re content with downing Smirnoff Guaranas, Smirnoff Ice Black and Red, Snapp, Guinness and many other similar brands. For the classy ones, they prefer Red Label, Jamesons, Jack Daniel, Johnnie Walker and the like. Others on another level will no touch anything if it’s not Malibu, Ciroc, Moet or even Ace of Spades… Anything else readily available for these girls is also not out-of-bounds. On a bad day, she’ll even settle for a McDowells and a Flirt Vodka. Smirnoff Vodkas too are very much in vogue amongst this pleasure-seeking lot. As for weed? They could rival the city of Kingston, Jamaica for the amount to weed they smoke. They’re also notorious sheesha freaks. And cigarette are also a very welcome stimulant.

PARTY SPOT

Like any regular campus partygoer, the party spot doesn’t mean much. What truly matters is what is on offer… You’ll find them partying it up in their hostels, or even in the back streets, in the cars or even in their homes. Westlands, however, is their main haunt. You’ll find them, wasted and high, scattered all over some of the most popular and flexible clubs in Westy and also in Hurlingham and Ngong Road.

Partying in the City Centre too is not something that’s too alien to them… But for the ones with the sponsors we just talked about, they don’t party in town. They’re picked up and driven off to secluded

locations by their aging sponsors… Secret villas in Lavington, hidden gated homes in Kitisuru and exotic, beautiful bungalows in Naivasha. Party. Don’t. Stop.

EXPENSE

She can be expensive. Or cheap… Depending on what she thinks of you. And what you generally mean to her. Better let her know where your finances stand early enough. Also, don’t ever try and show her the good life. She’s quick in adjusting. And also quick in exploiting. Some, however, are unbearably unaffordable. And that’s where the City Council guy with a silver blue Prado comes in.

RATCHETNESS

She’s a college girl. Surely, ratchetness is not something that’s too far from her menu. She’ll surprise you by the many things she can do.. In and out of bed,in and out of the club, in and out of sanity. As far as going wild, going rogue, letting loose ,acting silly, yelling herself, drinking from a trench and converting the car boot into a lodging, you can bet the Nairobi Uni girl to perfectly serve you that dish hot and spicy.

And here is the title…