CABU GAH DIARIES: Mugo Wa Wairimu….10 Moments When Facebook’s Most Toxic Blogger Totally Butchered The English Language. Number 7 Is Simply The Best!

Mugo Wa Wairimu is simply the most pernicious blogger that ever walked the face of Kenya. Forget Robert Alai’s very noxious rants,Mugo Wa Wairimu is quite the gem. A toxic gem. And his pandemonium across Facebook has quite managed to amuse and ruffle many.

Fresh from being a topic in The Senate,where Senators like Omar Hassan(Mombasa) made sensational claims alleging that he wanted to kill them(Wait,what???) Mugo Wa Wairimu has lived up quite to the hype. He is bluntly unapologetic,trenchant,discourteous and loud. And his posts always manage to ruffle quite a feather. And piss and enchant people in so huge a proportion.

How he even ended up with a following is a wonder…But given the Internet’s penchant of attracting sleaze-loving thrill-seekers,Mugo wouldn’t have to struggle too much to amass a following that waits,in bated breathe,for his next fanfaronade. And entertain them,he does. Bluntly and curtly. His writing can be as icy as a mountain peak and as tasteless as unseasoned beef. He cuts hard…And cuts deep….His love and fierce allegiance to the Jubilee Administration quite unmistakable.

He stops at nothing. And heeds to no one..Well,except Dennis Itumbi who he appears to worship. Besides that,Mugo’s Facebook Wall is a jungle of sorts where the most pestiferous rants are spewed and the most alarming pronouncements are made. Its a pretty heated corner. And Mugo quite relishes being the Bad Boy of Social Media Activism as he prefers to dub his cavalier work.

But even with his notoriety,Mugo’s Facebook posts boast one very peculiar characteristic;His flagrant disregard for either auto-correct,the English language,proper writing skills,the edit button or proofreading.

His posts have the lamest,blandest,thickest and most miserable grammar ever seen on a post. It’s really a pain to read them. Or wrap your head around them.

But,as usual,Mr.Bad Boy doesn’t seem to be perturbed. Not a bit. Th trade goes on…The hate blows on…the allegations fly on…the toxicity spreads on. Unbowed by the poor grammar.

Here are 10 MOMENTS when Mugo Wa Wairimu totally butchered the English Language. And made quite a mess of himself. And of The Queen’s Language. So much for being a blogger! Phew!

1.

Where do I even start?? Literary?? Moaned??? she’d???

2.

KTN ‘was discussed Me??’ Mentioned me ‘several‘?? Good Lord!

3.

‘Sympathicers’???

4.

Evil prayers ‘s NEVER be answered’??? They will ‘Miss’ waiting ‘Me to Miss” WTF is this shit exactly???!

5.Peasants who ‘do died’??? Fidel was ‘no more KenyanS‘?? Many of us ‘ate’ just pretending!??!

6.

“into the tone, wording and balance in the state house digital director’ sword”?? What exactly is this??? and “having never had any corporate or individual with Dennis Itumbi” My Oh My!

7.

Some ‘paople’s walls”??? Go to Your wall and ‘Wrote so…‘??? ‘Idling HEAR telling me what to write not write’??!!? This is beyond redemption! Arrrrrgh!

8.

‘Faint HATRED Kenyans‘??? What really is this???! ‘conviction lies at eve rep attempt‘!!! Even kindergarten kids are NOT this bad at constructing a plain sentence!

9.

Didn’t our Swahili teacher teach us this very simple saying in very simple terms?? What did Mugo’s Swahili teacher teach him??

10.Number 10 is dedicated to various reactions from the unfortunate people who have to bear Mugo’s very horrendous grammar.

 Aaaaaaaaaaand…..

I am of the opinion that if You call Yourself a blogger (Online journalist,writer,whatever) You should strive to set the pace as far as accuracy,adeptness,language prowess,expertise and correctness is concerned.

Doesn’t matter whether You are posting Your acidulous tweets/updates in a hurry, on in a ramshackle matatu or in a City Council toilet or in the middle of a City protest,Your message MUST be conveyed correctly and smartly. It doesn’t take 24 hours to proofread and edit a 2 sentence nonsensical post anyway!

Whatever is going on here is appalling. And sad. And disgraceful to the profession of Activism or blogging or lobbying or whatever it is Mugo Wa Wairimu claims (or pretends) to do for Humanity.

Good Lord.