TRIBAL TROUBLES: I’m Not Trying To Start Trouble,But After Much Research,This Is The PROBLEM with LUO Girls.

Having been around for a minute,and met quite a number of lasses-not fat luckily,dated them and had quite a ball with them,analyzing their varied characteristics and learning their mannerisms,I feel like I am sort of ripe (though not entirely ripe) to form a judgment on various Kenyan girls.

This is my little survey done by my little self for my little brothers out here interested in these Kenyan girls. Still,I could be wrong. And maybe I may have formed my judgements on a whole tribe based on one relationship gone awry. Or based on the actions of one lost girl who didn’t quite represent her heritage and culture. But no,this is no random survey,conducted like the Njoki Chege ‘Causes of Fat Tissues’ survey.

For this one,I took time. Actually dated some of these girls. And,ummm,even bedded them. And also talked to ‘my boys’. And you know what they say,boys don’t lie. Ok,mostly.

So what is it like dating a Luo girl? Or Kikuyu? Or Kalenjin? Well…You may have dated some – or all-of these girls already and what I am about to say about them may not be so new to you.

Well,I’ll judge my opinion on what I didn’t only experience for myself but also heard from ‘The Boys’.

I’ll be analysing all tribes by the way. Ok,all the big ones.

We’ve all talked about WHAT’S GOOD with various Kenyan girls. Away from that now… How about we now talk about WHAT’S BAD!?

It’s about time,hombre.

Here we go… Helmet at the ready…

THIS IS THE PROBLEM WITH LUO GIRLS.

They’re Too Party Oriented 
From what I’ve gathered,and seen and heard,a typical Luo girl has party on her mind 24/7. Luo girls love a good party. And they don’t hide that fact. To them,Fridays and Saturday nights should be taken seriously as the party days they are. If you’re trying to get some nice little girl who can actually sit at home and be mooulded into a wife,you’ll need to work harder. Coz these girls are 100% sold to the party. And they don’t just party… But party hard. Drink harder,dance themselves lame all night and totter home in the morning,lame and beat. You,as her boyfriend,will need quite a bottomless wallet to fund all her avaricious desires for booze and club revelry. And that is NOT economic. Or is it?

Girl-gang Oriented 
It’s hard for find Luo girls walking alone. And existing on their own either in a club,event,street,beauty lounge or party. Luo girls walk in gangs of their fellow girls most of whom,in most cases,are mean,vicious girls. You will have real trouble talking up a Luo girl or even managing to pull her from her gang incase you want to talk to her. They’re always in a firm,tight circle… And always exist in it. Refusing to let go of their girls or to exist on their own and walk alone. And these gangs can be lethal. And intimidating.

Too Choosy
Luo girls won’t just fall for you. Your shortcomings notwithstanding. They’re known to be extremely choosy of who they date and to be very particular on his attributes… From physical to material. Not saying that they are materialistic but Luo girls are highly superficial. They’re easily impressed by a man with a tantalizing physique,a man whose well-endowed physically,a man with some sort of social status and some level of class and also a man who,if he is driving,drives the heaviest,most powerful machine. They’re also very easily attracted to a house that is ostentatiously furnished… With huge Home Theater systems and large plasma TVs and such-like opulence. Their judgment,in most cases,is always physical and motivated by what the eye can see not what the heart can feel.

Can Be Loud And Boisterous
We all want a girl who can abide by us, play it cool and let us run things around right!? But in the case of the LUO girl,she’s not exactly what the doctor prescribed. Left to her own devices,a Luo girl can be extremely loud and boisterous,hogging all of the attention to herself and becoming unbearably difficult and stubborn. She’s known,as one who moves in a girl-gang,to enlist the help of her girls to cause a ruckus and assert her position in every situation. Brashly and violently. Her ego too is on another level. Much like the typical Nigerian woman,a Luo girl can really rise up to a level you never saw coming.

Too Showy 
Luos,like we’ve all been stereo-typically told in endless jokes and comedic skits,can be a tad too showy. And Luo girls have perfected this art. They’re,in addition to being loud and pompous,are very showy and assertive. They will want you to know what they have and how much more they have. They will want to name-drop. And intimidate people around them by manner of talk and exhibiting the possessions they immediate have. And quoting those that they don’t currently have around with them. They can be too assertive. And too full of themselves… Not for any humane achievement but for superficial things they’ve acquired. Legally or illegally. Cue,Akothee.

TOP: Luo Socialite,Judy Anyango.

Tend To Be A Little Loose…
Luo girls are very sexually independent and they seem to have very little inhibitions. And so,for them,having more than one sexual partner is not quite a big deal. It’s something they can work around and play around with quite easily. Of course not all of them are like this but the biggest majority of these girls are usually very sexually active and do not necessarily look into how they’re going about it or with who. You get the feeling that they sort of sleep around a little too much and are sort of easy to lay. As long as your game’s tight and you’ve got the right resources,bedding one of these is not necessarily too hard. And I’m speaking from experience. But again… I could be wrong.

Ratchet To The Core…
While most of them are sweet decent girls,most Luo girls are known to exhibit the highest levels of ratchetness. They’re the typical black girl. You will find them at a party dressed like they’re signing up for a stripper agency. And they’ll be the loudest at the party. Also,as the party catches fire,they’ll be the first to hit the floor,dance on the tables,yell themselves silly,undress if possible and even kick off their shoes. They will make sure everyone knows they’re around. And they will spare no effort in ensuring that they don’t just hog all the attention but also light up the place. As only they can.

They’re Outrageous

From their gaudy hairstyles…their weaves,to the color of the weaves,to their dressing,their mannerisms,their tattoos,their make-up and general outlook,Luo girls can be quite outrageous. It’s easy to spot them. Either by the ostentatious way in which they’re dressed,or the pompous way in which they talk and act around. Or whatever colorful thing is that they have on their heads. You won’t miss them. Not by a long shot.

And that’s where we conclude the piece of THE PROBLEM WITH LUO GIRLS.

TOMORROW : THE PROBLEM WITH KIKUYU GIRLS.