Kenya At 50: Why There Is Nothing Musical To Celebrate About Kenya At 50

I recently came across information that seems to indicate that the government has set aside 12million shillings for an album set to celebrate Kenya’s jubilee years -musically speaking. The album is allegedly being done by one Bruce Odhiambo who had the idea that his Facebook page is the ultimate way to interact with Kenyans of all shades, creeds and soci-economic standing.

But I will not go into why the choice of Facebook as the sole medium for interaction is flawed. Or why the spending of more than 1 million shillings to burn songs onto a CD is ludicrous. I will discuss why Kenya has nothing to celebrate post 1979.

Tabu  Ley -may his soul rest in eternal peace- once famously quipped that to make it in Africa, one had to first gain fame and acceptance in Kenya. We had them all in terms of AFRICAN CELEBRITIES. From Fadhili Williams to Kelly Brown.

Then came the dark years ushered in by Kanu-Nyayo’s repressive years that set us back 100 years culturally. We killed entertainment in Kenya except if it was choral music celebrating former president Daniel Toroitich arap Moi. Had I been alive, I dare say I would have been a guest at the torture chambers having my delicate bits gently massaged by a mysterious man with pliers.

And now Kenya through Bruce Odhiambo is celebrating Kenyan music from 1963-2013. I dare to breathe the question, “Why?”. What for? Celebrate music from 1963-1979. Nothing since then is worth celebrating with the exception of Kalamashaka and Camp Mulla who have let me down terribly. These are the only artists worth celebrating for the impact they had on the international scene. Do not celebrate mediocrity!

To Uncle Chim Tuna, Bruce Odhiambo is celebrating mediocrity. He is celebrating artists who have no name beyond the borders of Kenya. He is pandering to the gallery so as not to alienate Kenyan celebrities. I have no such qualms. And I have high standards.
Kenyan music since the 80s has largely been mediocre. Gone are the days when the Miriam Makebas, the Kanda Bongo Mans, the Tabu Leys, The Mbilia Bels, the Defaos would troop to Kenya to make a mark on African music.

Now we have to beg D’banj, Mafikizolo, Fally Ipupa, Davido to even think about coming to Kenya. We had a glimmer of hope in Camp Mulla but they screwed the pooch! So let us celebrate 50 years of what would have been a vibrant music industry but is now a decaying, diseased, decripit shadow of what it once was. Hongera Kenya!

Uncle Chim Tuna has spoken!